Vocare

Last Sunday was Pentecost and last Sunday was also the day I spent the afternoon and evening at Star of the North Retreat Centre in St. Albert (my old stomping grounds) for what was called a "Vocations Conference."

I feel as though I can not say anything too horrible about the whole thing as the idea behind the conference was geuine and because I also understand the logic in holding such a conference.

HOWEVER, I am having a really difficult time with what I have come back from it with and the questions and queries it has brought out of the woodwork.

In a quick attempt to find some way of figuring it all out, I would like to post the prayer that we were given prior to entering the final evening prayer session:

My Lord God,
I have no idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me.
I cannot know for certain where it will end.
Nor do I really know myself, and
the fact that I think that I am
following your will does not mean that I am
actually doing so.
But I believe the desire to please you,
does in fact please you.
And I hope that I have that desire
in all that I am doing.
I hope that I will never do anything
apart from that desire.
And I know that if I do this,
you will lead me by the right road,
though I may know nothing about it.
Therefore I will trust in you always.
Though I may seem lost
and in the shadow of death,
I will not fear,
You are ever with me.
And you will never leave me to
face my perils or call alone.
Amen.

Profound, huh? I thought so... when I read it, I thought that I might as well have been Thomas Merton writing Solitude!