Welcome to Alberta!

The "stupid landlocked province"!!  So, Miss Sunshine arrived to a local temperature of -24 Celsius (it's slightly warmer in the nearest city, but still much colder than the -8 that she left this afternoon).  The province where we try and protect our property to the extreme!

Ha ha ha ha ha... so, this will go down in the books as the greatest "first night in a new province" ever!  On the way home from the airport, we were driving along a familiar gravel road, when I notice that two (not one, but TWO) cars are parked in our field (aka, private property).  One car with it's lights on, and one... well... with a little "mood lighting". 

Miss Sunshine rolls down her window, I turn down the music, and to the fancy, red, (paid for by selling drugs) sports car, I say:

"Can I help you with something?  Are you lost?"

"No, we are just hanging out"

"Well, unfortunately sir, you need to find somewhere else to hang out as this is private property"

"You own the side of the road?"

"No, I don't.  We own the field that your car is sitting in though sir, so if you will kindly..."

"And what are you going to do about it?"

"Would you like me to call the RCMP and they can charge you with trespassing?"

"Oh yeah... go ahead!"

(picks up cell phone and dials number for the farm, without pushing send, as the car speeds off down the gravel road - with the huge inconvenience of finding a new meeting place to sell their illegal drugs).

To the other car with "mood lighting", I simply backed up, put my lights onto their license plate and we copied it down. Upon arriving home, I explained that there were two more vehicles in our field.  Farming Dad, quite upset, goes to start his truck.  Racing back into the house, he grabs a flashlight, his cell phone (in case of trouble), and his big winter boots.  This is the story he shared upon getting home a few minutes later...

"I didn't know if anyone was actually in the car - all the lights were off and it wasn't running"

"So... what did you do?  Knock on the window?"

"Nope.  I tried to open the door" 

(Most people leave their vehicles unlocked here in farming country, especially of Farming Dad's Generation)

"Ha ha ha ha ha... um... did it open?"

"Well no, but when I tried the handle, the lights inside the car came on.  There were two VERY startled kids in the backseat.  The young boy opened the window slightly, at which time I explained to him that he was actually parked on private property.  He was pretty embarrassed, so I told 'em - the parking rates are $10 a minute, so you hurry up... and then we'll settle up."

"Um... Dad?"

"They weren't there very long; there goes another high school graduate expecting her first in November!"

Aw man, I love Farming Dad to bits, but of all the things for Miss Sunshine to experience as her first and lasting impression of Alberta... there could have been slightly more... um... G-rated impressions!!  :D  Good times!