Augustine or ...?

Once upon a time, a time that seems oh so long ago, I went on a "camping" trip with some very holy friends.  One of the prayers that we used as a reflection point was a vocation prayer.  I then lost the paper it was typed out upon, then found it again, and then lost it.  Eventually, I managed to track it down and type it up. It is on a tiny piece of paper with size 6 font... it is coffee stained and crumpled. 

And yet, when I was cleaning out my car this weekend and found it, it felt like I had won the lotto. 

My Lord God, 

I have no idea where I am going. 

I do not see the road ahead of me.

I cannot know for certain where it will end.

Nor, do I really know myself,

and the fact that I think that I am following your will...

...does not mean that I am actually doing so. 

But I believe that the desire to please you,

does in fact please you.

And I hope that I have that desire in all that I am doing.

I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire.

 And I know that if I do this, you will lead me by the right road,

though I may know nothing about it.

Therefore, I will trust in you always.

Though I may seem lost

and in the shadow of death,

I will not fear for you are ever with me.

And you will never leave me to face my perils alone.

Amen.

 Really, the first paragraph of this prayer resonates the most with where I find myself at present... the notion of not really knowing where to go or where this road is headed.  Today, I gave resignation that I would no longer be working in a temporary full time administrator's position so that I could truly try my hand with a sense of commitment for nursing.  It has been great, no doubt, knowing that I have a paying job on a Monday-Friday basis - but in the realm of my greater gifts and talents, they may be better shared elsewhere?  I got this incredible sense of relief when I shared the decision with my mentor - am trusting that's a good sign. 

Going to ponder that for the month upcoming as I wait for this transition period to come to a close and cross my fingers that I am blindly heading in the semi-right direction.